My daughters are emotional. They can, and do, cry and laugh at the same time. It is not all that rare of occurance. My poor poor husband, cannot fathom why any one would do this...let alone why anyone would do this frequently, and dramatically. There is no box to put that kind of behavior into. And so Eddie shakes his head in wonder, bewilderment written across his face.
I, on the other hand, get it. A lot.
Yesterday, I was so encouraged to find a school that I felt really good about my kids attending. The class sizes are small, the teachers share our worldview, and the curriculum is challenging. Mostly, it just felt good. And in a school, culture counts. (Thanks Paula, you taught me that!)
Today, I am still happy about this option. But there is another emotion that wars with the peace I feel about this private school. It is sadness, and grief. The thing is I really, really love homeschooling (sometimes). I love my kids. I love teaching them. I love learning with them. I'm just not sure its the best choice for us now. We'll have to make a decision shortly, but today, I'm torn.
I understand tears with joy. It's called bittersweet. And I feel like whatever choice I make, homeschool or private, there will be a sweet sorrow in the living it.
Maybe that's why semi-sweet chocolate chips are the best kind. A little bitter to go with the sweet just makes for a fuller, rounder, more whole experience.
1 comment:
Ugh. I haaaaaaaaaaaaate big decisions and I feel for you!
I will pray for clarity for you!!! I LOVE hs'ing, too. It's the best part of my day with my kids, so I get it. We are taking hs'ing one year at a time, reevaluating each year, so next year is up in the air for us, too (although I expect to keep hs'ing for now)
And...i'm so with you with the chocolate bars! :)
p.s.
Thanks for 'following' my blog! :) I feel so loved! :)
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