Hearing from God sans Neon Signs

I went to Santa Fe just as the cloud of Depression was lifting...I went to celebrate. And I went looking for answers.

Now I am home.

Depression, if nothing else, taught me that something has to change. I cannot keep "this" up. I'm not exactly sure what "this" is, but "this" has got to change. In particular, I wanted to hear from God about my kids schooling. Public? Private? Homeschool? "And could you spell out the answer in a big neon sign God, if you please?" I told Eddie I was looking for vision - God's clear direction. He smirked. He said that in his experience God rarely worked that way.

What does Eddie know? I want a neon sign, dang it!

Well as it turns out there were no God ordained neon signs in Santa Fe, just some kick-ass green chili. And that's okay. Mostly okay. Because I do feel like I heard from God, sans neon, of course.

He said, "Come to me all you weary and burdened and I will give you rest." and he reminded me that, "even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death I will fear no evil, because GOD IS WITH ME."

My first thoughts were...."Ahh that's great God, but what should I do with my kids' school?" He said, "Come to me; you're weary and burdened and I will give you rest."

"Yeah God, you mentioned that...but what about my kids?" And then I shut up for a second, and I listened. And I let it penetrate my thick skull.

Rest. He offered rest. He wants to be WITH ME. And that is a balm to my serotonin deprived brain.

So do I know for sure what we'll do for school? Nope. But I decided to get first things first. I will run to Him. Because that's where I'll find rest and healing. And I will humbly accept what he has offered. He has offered himself.

For the record, public school is off my short list for options. I talked to the administration chic and she filled me in on the district's policy. It would be a serious challenge to get the kids into a school I'm comfortable with at this point.

And I have this issue with policy.

It's my policy to disregard their policy. I think it's dumb. I didn't tell the chic I thought it was dumb. But I really wanted to...because it's dumb.

So that leaves homeschool and private school. And well, actually, we don't exactly have the funds for private. Well if we got very, very, very creative we MIGHT. The short list is getting shorter...

And maybe that's my answer.