Steppin' on Toes

So I thought I'd step on some toes and talk about race...

When I went to school at CU it was en vogue in some circles to say race was an artificial social construct. They said there were more genetic variances within a particular "racial" group than within humanity at large. They said there was no such thing as race.

I always thought that was kinda dumb.

My reasons were less scientific.

I wondered why little white kids, who've only grown up around other little white kids think all black kids look the same. I know I thought that all black kids looked the same, at least, until DeMarcus became my friend. Then DeMarcus looked like DeMarcus.

I was talking to a black woman who was married to a white guy at a picnic at my sisters house; she joked that all white people looked the same. Apparently, it goes both ways.

We know who's "in" and who's "out" by the shade of our skin, and the size of our butts, and the slant of our eyes. Race may be an artificial social construct, but it does matter.

I think it's confusing that it matters.

Today there are no neat little categories; probably, there never were. Here is what I mean: My friend's Ethiopian children are African, but to me, they look nothing like the West Africans I befriended in Ghana. And the African Americans who were with me in Ghana were declared "white" by the nationals there. They were too light, and too tall...which, sadly, has slavery written all over it.

Black and white aren't straight forward. Because, actually, our black president-elect is only half African. He's definitely black, but he isn't African American in the traditional sense..in the sense where he can trace his roots back to slaves. Some people would say that that's irrelevant, because in this country having dark skin and kinky hair is all it takes for people to see you differently. I might agree...but I'm not sure.

The black and white discussion is an academic one for me...because I'm the only one in my family who uses hair products for people of color...and my color is, well, I'm a white girl.

What's confusing to me is the issue what it means to be Native American. My blond haired and blue-eyed "Barbie" look-alike college roommate got a discount on tuition because she was Cherokee, and had the documentation to prove it. My husband's great-grandma was Choktaw, and my great-grandma lived on a reservation. My youngest daughter is Lakota, but it can't be documented, so she is not eligible for tribal membership. But she actually looks like a Native American. When Eddie and I went to New Mexico some Native American little girls came up to us and tried to sell us jewelery. It was creepy how very much they resembled our baby.

So is our baby Native American? Legally, nope. But, really, she is. Does it matter? I'm not sure. Will she care about her genetic heritage? I can't say. What I do know is that when I look into the face of my brown-eyed girl I see my daughter. Her eyes are brown, and her skin is darker than my own...but when I look at her all I see is the girl I love.

What do you think? Race is real, right? Or not? Does it matter? Or doesn't it?

Because this should be documented for posterity...

So it was the day after Thanksgiving and we went down to Littleton for a Christmas light parade, and leftovers at Grandpa's. Sounds harmless, fun even. Well, someone got the time of the parade wrong by an hour and a half. So, mostly we stood around in the cold for an hour with four kids plus assorted cousins. Never did make it to the parade.

My five and six year old had to pee while we were waiting for the much-talked-of-never-seen parade. So we searched out a port-a-potty. My six year old was disgusted by the port-a-potty and after much drama and tears used the potty, even though the seat was chilly.

Next, it was the five year old's turn. I toss him in the port-a-potty and shut the door. And then I remember...the kid's still wearing his mittens. This could be a problem. Quickly, I open the door and offer to hold the mittens. Unfortunately, I was too late. My son said, "No, it's all right Mom, I just put them in this holder." What holder? Ah, that would be the urinal (aka mitten bowl).

Pisser!

Exactly.

The leftovers were good though...

There is a moral to this story, an important one, at that. ALWAYS, ALWAYS hold your five year olds mittens for him while he pees in the port-a-potty. Don't say I never told you...

November: a photo documentary

M and me

This was my baby...how is it that he is so big?

kids.

Ahh...the photography of a 5 year old...something to behold...here is me making hot cocoa

Baby and me

He's sexy when he throws stuff...

Remember November

The kids built a candyland from trick-or-treat loot...before, I, in a fit of motherly concern for their health pitched it.

I only had baby carrots so our snowman has a cucumber nose.

Baby is not convinced snow is fun...

Maybe a little fun.

November in pictures

2 days after Thanksgiving we had our first real snow.

Apple slicer invented with circuit board.

Pre-snow leaf playing...M is buried under there somewhere

I found my camera in the office...it was sticky. Next time the culprit should not photograph himself in the act. When asked about this picture the said 5 year old culprit asked, "Mom, was that cute or am I in trouble?"

My Answers

Some questions on a FridayJerry Springer: Real-life guests, or staged actors? ACTORS

Organics: Worth the money, or total rip-off? Generally, a rip-off, maybe...

Twilight series: Great fiction, or over-hyped? Cannot say...as I haven't read 'em...gotta be better than the "Left Behind" series

Libraries: Useful resources, or too much trouble? I adore the library

Babysitting: Easy way to earn some cash, or equivalent to torture? Torture

High school: So much fun, or a necessary evil?EVIL!!!!!!!

Big yearly vacations: Definite musts, or costly extravagances?Vacations are necessary, but the don't necessarily have to be expensive...camp.

Regular date nights: Essential for a good marriage, or impractical and overrated? Love the idea...can't seem to pull it off...do you know how much babysitters cost?

Church: Kids worshipping with you, or in Sunday School the whole time?Sunday School - a girl needs a break from her children from time to time.

Sesame Street: Educational, or ridiculous? Ridiculous, but a good way to get a shower with toddlers in the house

.Jim and Pam: Should definitely get married, or getting married will ruin the show? Sadly, it might be ruined

.Donuts: Sugary delights, or fatty stomach-ache-inducers?Stomach ache inducers, but worth it from time to time.

Caffeine: A must in the morning, or something you avoid?I cannot imagine a life without caffine.

just showing up: Some questions on a Friday

just showing up: Some questions on a Friday

These are some fab questions my cyber friend, Briana ,posted on her blog. Someday I will actually meet her in real life...I know it. Hope your kids feeling better Briana.